OMBAK RINDU

Watched Ombak Rindu..the Malay movie that made many viewers cried buckets. Based on their FB statuses of course.

NOT ME though..hehehe..

I didn't enjoy it very much and I didn't read the novel either. I just thought I watched it cause I have nothing better to do. Hehehe..

1. I think Maya Karin was not suitable to be Izzah. She has a different slang to her Malay. So, I felt weird about it. I am still thinking who should be Izzah. Tiz Zaqyah possibly but maybe that would be typical as well because of her role in Nur Kasih..so, who else is there? But don't get me wrong, Maya Karin did her job very well.
2. Aaron Aziz was great. He is indeed a good actor
3. I really liked the dialogues that were prepared for Hariz. It was similar to everyday conversations..well, most of the scenes la..not all..unlike the dialogues for Izzah..I mean, for example 'Di sini lah Izzah cuba lari dari Abang tapi di sini lah Abang juga beritahu yang Abang sayangkan Izzah, ombak dan pantai menjadi saksi..bla bla bla..' Hahaha..everyday conversation cakap macam ni ke? That is why Yasmin Ahmad's films were good and close to heart sebab her dialogues were real..her dialogues ye not her scenes..sebab I do feel like sometimes some of her scenes were over the top.
4. I wish Izzah is more real as a woman yg berkongsi suami. Sure akan ada rasa geram bila your husband has to go out with the other wife. I wish there is some humour in her character. Not much, just a bit. Like maybe give some kind of evil eye look when Mila and Hariz was leaving or something like that. It would be nice to laugh a bit and be sympathetic with her. I tried to be but I can't cause she was too soft. You know who I like as a strong woman character, the lawyer character acted by Fazura in Tahajjud Cinta. She was great in that role.

I have a lot to say and I felt like creating a forum about it. Hahaha..but well, overall, it is not a bad movie. Just basically ok.

Normally, what made me cry when I watched a movie is when it involves parents and their children. Like the movie Cinta and the ending of Nur Kasih where Afida Es remembered her son and hugged him. *sigh*..mmg bergenang airmata..

So,anyway, at least I have one entry for today :)

PHEW...

Submitted my thesis this morning. Yeay!

But not without a drama!

I actually submitted yesterday evening, ingat pagi ni dapat la bangun tidur feeling calm and free. Anyway, after submission, I went back to school and my friends congratulated me etc..then one of them made a joke about 'the worst thing that can happened is if your title is wrong due to spelling etc'..I laughed and I looked at the cover page of my first draft and there it was!

A grammar mistake! It should Fabrication and not Fabricating! OMG!

Dah la ni jenis bind yg glued the pages together, something like a book. If it was mcm yg ring-binding tu then it would be easier to change la kan. So, it was 4.30pm then, graduate school closed at 5pm. I rushed back to the building and I asked the reception whether I can take it back..the people from graduate school told me that it was just a soft bound copy and not the hard bound copy..so not to worry..but I told her..I will not be able to sleep tonight..hehehe..so, I took it back, printed out the correct cover page and jadi mcm kraftangan session la pulak..in the end, I managed to slide the cover page in the slot and glued it again. Haihh..mcm2..yang kelakarnya, even my supervisor and his research associate pun can missed it. That's what happened if you were too focused on the content, sampai small things boleh tak perasan.

But to be honest, after submission, I don't feel like super-happy or anything like that. I think because I know there will be the viva session and after I pass that, yes, I can be super-happy and excited sampai keluar airmata. I wish Mr. PIC was here, tengah ada free time macam ni mmg seronok kalau dapat jalan2 kan?

Well..last night, me and my colleagues celebrated my submission day despite the drama because theoretically I had submitted..hehehe..but Alhamdulillah, it all ends well.

The thing is, I can't go home yet, because I have to do some lab work in Durham to publish a journal (finally!)..so, I hope and pray I can come home before mama's birthday (22nd January)..

So, again Alhamdulillah..thesis submitted!

Yeay :)

MODERATION

Me and hubby..we didn't have a big fancy wedding u know..but it was meriah la..as any wedding should be..our honeymoon was at Langkawi and we stayed at Andaman..it was so lovely. Sometimes I do feel a tang of jealousy when newly-weds went to honeymoon kat Bali ke, Koh Samui ke..

But then, when he was here, we had the best time travelling to Paris and Barcelona..it was a tight budget vacation..no fancy hotel..no Eiffel Tower view..we were just being moderate I guess..tapi kdg2 mmg teringin sangat nak splurge..

The point here is, both us would love that...driving fancy cars..5 stars vacation..we want that..but we thought way ahead..you know..in case we need money kinda thing..I have witnessed a number of people that just have this image of such a fancy lifestyle...driving a beamer..living in a fancy house..vacations..but actually..hmm...there are so many layers to that image..it just that sometimes you have to prioritize.. get things that you need and not what you want..of course not all the time la..apa salahnya pun if sometimes you splurge..

Hmm..this post is starting to be heading nowhere..I miss home. Really I do. I am currently feeling very hopeful that it scares the shit out of me..hence, this pointless entry.

I gave a talk last week to a bunch of people in my research group. I was so nervous that I could actually faint. But, Alhamdulillah..it went well..after the first 2-3 slides..I felt very confident and everything was ok. People got back to me saying that they enjoyed the talk. It made me feel all good inside. I haven't felt that way about my research for a while..so, it was great I suppose. The most scary thing people could say to a PhD candidate is .."Is that all you did?"..huhuhu..I guess that's why I felt so nervous.

I can't wait to settle down in KL. Mr.PIC is looking for a house for us..*excited*..tapi rumah yg dekat with my university mmg mahal la..he wouldn't buy it yet..just looking around..do I have to stay as far Sungai Buloh or Rawang? Maybe..if I want a nice house with gardens with reasonable price I suppose. Kondominium pun ok..but my mom is really against that..hmm..she prefers a nice proper house..

Anyway..I need to go down to the kitchen..have some cooking to do tomorrow at my friend's house. Libyan style :)

LEAVING MY NEST

I am moving out from this house sometime this week. Maybe Sunday..I chose a room that I can rent for a minimum of 3 months..sebab insyaAllah..I'll be leaving soon.

I am writing this because I am feeling sad...I am sad of leaving this house. There are just so many memories. I am going to miss the freedom of having my own space. At this age..I don't think that I would be living with housemates anymore..tapi this room that I like..rumah dia bersih..bilik dia pun besar and kitchen dia pun ok..I just need to adapt leaving with strangers again. I am more worried about the toilet actually. I want an en-suite room. But it is quite hard to get with reasonable price.

Later I will call Mr.PIC and ask his opinion. We had a bit or a rough moment just now. I was tired because I have to settle so many things with so little time..it was partly my fault la maybe sebab nak move out earlier than expected. Anyway, I kinda snapped at him a bit...then he sounded upset..even his sms was simple..so, I knew that something had gone wrong..I called him back..and asked, dia merajuk ke etc..he said no la..sometimes I think that he thinks I don't know him. Susah sangat ke for a guy to tell your other half that you upset sebab let's say the wife terlepas cakap ke..ye la, I am not his girlfriend anymore..I am his wife...if tak communicate kan susah..well, I just apologize and hang up..I was upset as well in a way..because of his attitude I guess *sigh*..

Oh well..I hope everything will be ok tomorrow morning as I need to discuss this room thing with him. I need to book the room soon.

I thought of going home in November..just a short break..2 weeks maybe..I know it is a waste of money..but I need to go home..I miss Mr.PIC and I miss my family..I hope my SV will understand and I hope he could help me out by reading the chapters as fast as he can.

I better stop now. Nak dinner pun no appetite. Just ate a slice of pizza. So, bye for now.

ALONE

Mr.PIC had gone back last Wednesday. I cried buckets when he went to the security gate. It took me a while to go back down the escalator and headed back home. A part of me was hoping that he would turn around, mcm filem hindustan..heheh..

Dalam teksi pun menangis lagi and when I opened the door to our married home for the last 2 years..I just broke down and cried and cried..I miss him so much..lemah seluruh jiwa raga..I honestly felt that a part of me was gone.

I gathered all my strength and went to school on that very same day. I needed to go, otherwise I would just ended up crying. A friend was staying with us till that weekend, so, I was not completely on my own for the first few days after he left. Otherwise, I think it would be harder for me to cope.

My landlord was kind enough to let me stay for as long as I need. I asked for another 2 weeks extension which means that I can stay until end of November.

The question remains: Can I submit my thesis by then??

Ya Allah, Ya Rabbi, please make it possible..I pray that I can..I want to be with my husband again. 1 and a half month is already a long time...I hope that I don't have to extend anymore. I had submitted one chapter for my supervisor to review. I know that there will be a lot of corrections..

But if I have to extend jugak..kena la redha and yakin with Allah's plan..

Mr.PIC asked me to persevere and continue to work hard till the end. InsyaAllah sayang. I love you.

A PEACE OF MIND

I am looking forward to the day where when I wake up in the morning, I no longer think about my PhD..ergh..wait, I think that should be my motivation la kan? Hmm..at the moment I am feeling quite low.

Mr. PIC is leaving soon. He is leaving me..here..alone..huhuhu..well, he has been here longer than we had planned, so, I think it is okay for him to go and started his career again. I just can't imagine not having him around the house anymore or knowing that he'll be back from work soon. I feel sad whenever I think about that. I need to adapt and be independent again. Heck I have been taking care of myself all this while before we got married. So, I just need to adapt again. But still sedih la...sob sob

PhD? I don't know what to update about that. Rasa macam sikit je lagi..I feel sometimes it is within my grasp. I just have to believe that I can do it. I must! Otherwise, lama la me and Mr. PIC baru dapat jumpa balik.

People sometimes don't understand how hard it is to do a PhD. I used to think that I can do it in 3 years..but we never know the obstacles that come..the things that caused all these delays. Supervisors..personal issues..you have to motivate yourself constantly and jangan dilayan sangat malas tu.

*Sigh*..one thing I regret is that I didn't start this kind of momentum earlier. Mmg terkilan. Biasalah during the first two years..you kinda take it slow and steady. Not in the mood? Fine..just relax and do some simple work like writing, surfing the net..no need to go in the lab/cleanroom at all. 3rd year, hmm..start to panic a bit. And now, in this first 6 months extension, no more honeymoon! I wouldn't want to think about not doing anything..even though sometimes I am desperate to just relax.

BUT, and this is a big BUT..since Mr.PIC is leaving soon, I am taking a week off to travel with him..hahaha..He has been here for almost 2 years but he has not gone to Europe pun. So, we are going to visit Barcelona and Paris..I have been to both places before but I guess it will be nice to go there with just the two of us this time.

After that, back to square one. I can do it. I believe I can! InsyaAllah :)

EID 2011

This year's Eid, rasa syahdu..at this moment, it is raining here, hujan rahmat di pagi Jumaat..I think, I felt bad for Mr. PIC..he should be able to celebrate Eid with his family this year but because he feels obligated to stay and support me, which is very kind of him you know, I do need him here..*sigh* I don't know, mix feelings.

Just now when he sent me to school, he was not as chirpy as usual. My gut feeling is telling that he is sad I suppose, reading FB statuses of his friends..looking at pictures of Iftar/Raya food, cookies..people saying that they are on their way to their home etc..hmm..I am kinda used to it..my raya sebelum ni pun biasa2 saja. But on Mr. PIC side, it is meriah and gamat, even through simple gatherings pun I can sense that excitement..I am sure he misses all that.

Well, he plans to go home middle of October and I hope by that time, I will be okay on my own for a while. Hopefully, experiment pun dah habis and I just need to finish my writing up. Hmm..sometimes I feel like I depend on him too much emotionally..

I hope he feels better soon, I already miss his chirpy self. Love you!

UPDATE AND RAMADHAN

Sorry, it has months since my last update. I did feel the urge to jot down sometimes but then I just thought..nah, not that interesting anyway.

But as it turned out, my two close friends decided to start blogging again. It made me happy to read updates about them and not only be limited by FB..I read somewhere..we are currently living in a WTF world..Wikipedia, Tweeter and Facebook :)

Anyhow, life has been hectic. I have two and a half months to go before my 1st extension finishes. Erkk..a lot of things happened beyond my control..equipment down..sample tak ready lagi..*sigh*..my only motivation is to finish my labwork by October and then apply for like 2-3 months extension for writing up..

If people ask me now whether I want to do my PhD, I would say NO WAY!..hahaha..it is a journey yg penuh dengan ups and downs..so far boleh kira dgn jari the good moments...but now, I feel good about my research..hahaha..skrg ni la..earlier this week I told my friend, this is a stupid project! stupid..stupid..stupid..! Well, like I said, it is full of ups and downs.

Ramadhan this year..18++ hours of fasting. The first two days, I had a terrible headache. First day, I pulled through, tapi berbuka pun tak ada selera and I just ended up in bed after that. Second day, the headache started earlier..I had decided to break my fast as I need to go to work for my part-time job..I think..no wait..I KNOW that it will get worse if I continued my fast. I had done that before during last year's Ramadhan and I ended throwing up kat sink at my workplace. Not a pretty sight :). Anyway, I just had a bottle of energy drink and some fruits. Popped it a couple of paracetamol and I felt better after a while.

My dear Mr. PIC is kind enough to cook for iftar during the weekdays. I just lend a helping hand after I got home from work. Hehehe..during weekend, we planned a cooking project. Last week, cooked lamb shank using slow cooker. The week before that I cooked Mi Kari..not bad la for a first trial kan..heheh..

Hmm, gonna have an update meeting with SV in a couple of hours. Better start compiling my results. Till we meet again.

BROKE DOWN

I broke down this morning. Cried after Mr. PIC went off to work. *Sigh*..sedih mengenangkan nasib.

A friend who just got married earlier this year is expecting. I told Mr. PIC about it. He just said..takpela, tu rezeki dia..

Maybe a part of me is sad sebab he is not in the same zone maybe. Not really into it like myself. But, then again I might be wrong. Men..never shows their true feelings ye tak?

I have to be confident with God's plan for me..for my life..God knows what is best for me..I kept reciting that to myself..tapi airmata ni tetap mengalir jugak..I'll be fine after a while. Just sometimes I need to vent out this feelings..although I know there is no solution pun..semuanya rezeki from Him..kun fayakun..

APRIL 2011

Update more frequent huh? Well, not really..heheh..

Hmm..it's 17 of April already and the next 2 weeks will be gone just like that, sebab Easter holiday and bank holidays due to the Royal Wedding. Aha, that reminds me..I thought of getting the Royal Wedding stamp..heheh..saja simpan buat kenangan. Ye la, zaman our parents maybe the wedding of Charles and Diana..but for us, it's William and Kate :)

Anyway, no plans so far during the Easter break. My SIL ada cakap nak datang sini but that is not confirm yet. I just feel like chilling at home and maybe doing some write-up sikit. Nothing much to write anyway. Dah a few weeks static je. Kalau add some data pun, maybe 2-3 pages..

Talking about write up, I had my 3rd year progression 2 weeks ago. It went well I guess. The panel asked me about my writing up process. I told him, I already written around 80+ pages. He said, well, you are 2/3 in your thesis. Just a matter of compiling more data and results. In my timeline to KPT, I wrote that by the end of April, I will start compiling or writing up until October. I think that is quite hard to achieve..heheh..BUT..since I have started my writing up pun..at least I can use maybe up to 3 months for my lab work..and then from August onwards, it is writing up all the way. I just hope my SV can check the drafts and gave the feedback fast.

Hmm..currently, kepala tgh pening pasal visa extension. I went to the visa workshop and it was quite scary. Salah sikit, hantar balik and they will keep your fee..so, kena fork out extra money for the next application..tapi, semalam tanya one of my friends kat sini, she had to re-apply sebab gambar tak ikut guidance..they just ask her to re-send without fee..so, actually orang UKBA ni pun understands la..kita ni student..mana nak cari duit..hehehe..as for the workshop speaker, he just wanted us to do correctly for the first time to avoid the hassle I guess.

I am thinking of quitting my part-time job...but looking at my expenditure table, chewah..If I can keep working at least until July..comfortable la jugak to maintain staying in our current rental house..although we are going to ask whether we can get couples accommodation from the uni for a duration of 3 months from August nanti..it would be good to get a cheaper house..and let's say that we get it, then we gonna have to ship some stuff home. Hmm..mcm2 la dalam kepala ni. Mr. PIC just ask me to concentrate with PhD..well, he is just being nice..I will keep on thinking about these stuff..it will be like a dark cloud hanging over my head..

It has been a while. I have stories to jot down here tapi selalu postpone. Anyhow, visa extension. Belum boleh nak proceed sebab I am still waiting for the letter from KPT. Without that letter, mmg tak boleh nak buat apa2. Isi borang semua tu mmg la, just nak start hantar tu yg kena tunggu. Besides, I need to go to the visa workshop anyway. Nak kena isi borang betul2. Moreover, kena fill in form for myself and form for hubby as my dependent. Semua tu nak kena isi accurately.

Last week was a sad week for me. Firstly, an a-level friend passed away. I didn't even know that she was sick until I went to her FB and her friends wrote on her wall saying 'Get well soon'..'Stay strong..' and ultimately her sister wrote that she had passed away. I was informed by a text message sent from another friend. It was 1.30am UK time. I couldn't go back to sleep. I ended up calling her and asked what happened. I kept thinking about arwah and the time we had during a-level. We were in the same class for 2 years. It was one of the best times of my life. Another sad news was a friend of mine lost her mom on Saturday..I think she lost her father in 2009..so, I felt so sad for her..but Alhamdulillah, she has a husband and her son by her side. I hope she will be strong throughout this ordeal. I am very grateful to still have my parents..especially my mom..I need her guidance, her love and especially her constant prayers for me..Doa seorang ibu itu amat2 penting bagi seorang anak..she is going to perform her Hajj again this year..this time with my dad..she asked will I come back before she goes to Mecca..hmm..it will be in October and I will be quite busy settling my things here..entah la..maybe I should go home earlier just to see her..maybe beraya kat Malaysia? Just a thought.

Mr.PIC and I are doing well. I am still hoping for a miracle..tapi..kena redha dengan ketentuan Allah..when the time is right..we will have our precious bundle of joy..at the moment, I just want to enjoy our time..just the two of us. PhD..hmm..entah la..susah nak cakap..I am tired actually..tired of dealing with the same problem..no matter what I do..I just couldn't get it right..it is so demotivating and depressing sometimes.. Anyhow, I think I'll better stop now. Will try to update more frequently next time.

FRIDAY: 4th March

Arghh..what a day so far..it stucks in my mind..the picture that didn't show where my wire is suppose to be and that sucks.

Haihh..tensionnya..Allah saja yg tahu..I though it would turned out ok..but I think I am gonna stuck doing the fabrication for another couple of months..ish..I just have to remain calm. Nothing can come out if you decided to mourn on your bad luck too much..kena cepat2 pick yourself up and decided on the next action.

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MONDAY: 7th March

I am not feeling well. Since yesterday morning, my throat has started to sore. Nak swallow pun sakit. Dah ada tanda2 nak demam. So today, I decided not to come to school and just lepak kat rumah. I still have to go to work though. Mr.PIC suruh je ambik MC tapi..I already know that today our area is two staff down. Kalau saya cuti, sure susah supervisor nak cari orang ganti..so, yeah, I kinda nice that way..heheh..I just hope that by this evening, I will feel much better.

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I like asking Mr.PIC about our past..for example, as usual every night he wanted me to massage his feet. So, I asked him, masa first date, what do you think of me? You rasa I lawa tak? hahaha..of course untuk dapatkan massage, dia akan jawab "Lawa.."..hehehe..but then I said.."Tipu, tak convincing langsung.." Then he replied.."Betul, masa you bukak gate tu, I rasa..lawanya dia.." kah kah kah..whatever la..I massage his feet anyway..tapi dalam hati ada taman la kiranya..saja..seronok apa tanya2 soalan mcm tu..

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I read a few blogs lately regarding hijab..I wore hijab a few days after I got my period..I felt so scared..of course at first my hijab was not perfect pun..I pakai tudung selimpang..tidak menutupi dada..I think after 1-2 years..baru I pakai tudung yg menutupi dada sampai la sekarang but I know I am still far from perfect..my point is..it is a process that requires you to take the first step..you definitely going to need support from someone..whether your family or your spouse..your friends..whoever pun..because it is a huge step...I have to admit..it did occur to my mind masa belum kahwin dulu..that I can be a lot prettier by exposing my hair..I can be more in style with the crowd..tapi semua tu hasutan semata-mata...kena kuatkan semangat..

The generalization that women who wears hijab is not exactly a good person..well, I understand that it is to counter attack the generalization that woman that is not wearing hijab is not a good person..haihh..that is so wrong..it depends on the individual..a good heart..

BEING A WIFE

Mr.PIC somehow strain his back while working on Sunday. He came home and told me about it..and it was difficult for him to get up after sitting down..after lying down..walking pun have to be careful.

Later that night, I don't know but I felt kinda irritated..*felt bad*..I got irritated sebab last week..gigi dia sakit..this week..belakang dia sakit..pasal sakit tu I can handle..tapi mengada-ngada dia tu that made me irritated..hmm..suruh urut tangan/kaki la..etc..tapi suruh picit tangan/kaki tu mmg everyday pun..I am tired too..morning pergi school then petang kerja..balik dari kerja..I wanna just chill with him and watch TV and just browse the internet..I rarely ask him to give me a massage or anything unless it is something like back pain or kat pinggang ke..then..I asked him to give me a massage sekejap..

Well anyway, back to that Sunday night..I told him off..*bad wife*..I just said..you just want to watch TV comfortably..ada orang picit tangan you kaki you..I think I should enrol you kat spa or something..if I have 4 hands..tangan kaki you la I picit..jahat kan? hmm..well, after that he went quiet..and I felt really bad after that..dia merajuk la tu kan..that night before we went to sleep..I apologized and last night I offered to picit kaki dia..mula2 jual mahal tu..heheh..after that..dia hulur la kaki dia untuk dipicit..hmm..macam2..

I read in a blog once and the blogger who is a she by the way mentioned masa dia bujang dulu dia jealous tgk couples yg dah kahwin and she thought senangnya the wife nak masuk syurga by being wife yg solehah. Then after she got married, baru dia realize yg susah nak jadi isteri yg solehah ni. Mmg mencabar kesabaran betul. I agree with her now...ye la, with Mr. PIC being unwell..this is the time to get pahala by taking care of him..willingly..tak payah tunggu dia suruh pun..but what happened instead? I got irritated..hurt his feelings..haihh..I felt really bad and lousy..I still do even when I am typing this.

I really hope that I can be a good wife..kena banyak sabar..kuatkan iman..insyaAllah..

Mr. PIC is not feeling well. Gigi dia sakit and at the same time, he feels like coming down with a cold. Poor baby. He is sleeping now on the couch now. As for me, just being online with the TV turned on is enough for me. I am kinda easy to please you know.

Another friend of mine announced that she is pregnant. She has been married I think for almost 4 years now, and I am happy for her. She was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and after the treatment and all, and once the doctor gave her the nod to proceed on trying to conceive, they succeeded. I am happy for them but of course, being me, I felt this big lump in my throat. I want a baby too.

Hmm..sometimes when I watched how couples handled their baby whenever their babies were having tantrum..I turned to Mr.PIC with this scared look and he said.."See, you were only thinking about the cute, cuddly stuff,heheh.." Yeah, kinda true..well, who wouldn't right? I mean, after all the tiredness of dealing with the difficult things, all the cute, cuddly, melt your heart kinda things that are going to make it all worth while. Kan?kan?

Just have to continue praying and hoping..the rezeki will come when the time is right..

NOT IN THE MOOD

I woke up this morning feeling down. Don't know why..just don't feel like doing anything, I didn't even want to come to school pun today..hmm..

But then ku gagahi juga diri ini..walked to school and did some things that I have planned to do. Although sebenarnya, banyak nak buat..I told myself..do something..anything that is PhD related..tak kisah la apa pun..and I did one experiment in the cleanroom and I helped a technician with a check list for this one equipment..so ok la kot for the day..*sigh*..this is not good...

It feels like so close but yet so far. Rasa mcm nak sampai dah at the end of the tunnel..tapi tak sampai2 pun lagi..hmm..nak publish paper pun supervisor suruh tunggu..wait till you get the ultimate result..well, in my opinion, kalau I send my abstract first, yg penting accepted..once accepted, the full paper will be requested a few months after that and by that time, hopefully, I have obtained my results already la kan..duh..but yeah, don't argue with your supervisor. Once he started to get annoyed with you..susah la..

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What is this about 'Wordless Wednesday' blog entries? Heheh..I found out about it the first time in one famous blog..and then all of a sudden..most blogs that I have followed started doing it. Even with the same title..Hey, don't get me wrong, it is your blog..up to you nak buat entry mcm mana..nak letak one word entry pun it is totally up to you..I just find it amusing..heck, maybe I will end up doing it too :)

FEBRUARY 2011

Gosh, how fast time flies..it is February already and for all you know, it is going to be April soon.

I have submitted my extension application and it seems to be going well. I mean, I don't know whether I will get it but I just know that it is in process and for that, I am glad. Once my visa is extended, I think I will consider quitting my part-time job. Maybe by May or June. Cukup la 2 tahun saya bekerja, hehehe..

Last week was tough. The hits just keep on coming. But then, what I think make me felt happy and kinda proud of myself was that I managed to find out what is the cause of the problem. Hmm..I went back to basic..did some research and I managed to find out what went wrong. Once I know what went wrong, at least I can find out a solution..although I still don't know whether it will work out or not, but, at the moment, it all make sense. The thing is, the process of trying to solve the problem and finding out possible solutions had made me realized how I have grown as a researcher..chewah...but of course, all the inspirations came from Him and I am grateful for the light at the end of this particular tunnel. I do hope that it will all work out.

What else?Hmm..I kept telling myself that everyone's PhD journey is different. Stop comparing or you will end up 'sakit jiwa' or even worse, 'riak'...Riak because your journey is better...riak because your journey shows that you are brighter than the rest and so forth..although at the moment, whenever I start to compare, it is more towards rasa sakit jiwa..heheh..

A colleague of mine had finished her viva and she basically a Doctor now. We are so happy for her but of course couldn't help to feel crazy jealous that she has finished. Heheh..she said, just be patient, your time will come. Yeah, I know..insyaAllah my time will come..the time when the examiners will shake my hand..and said..'Congratulations, Dr.'...I think at the time, I will scream with happiness and hug my husband as tight as I possibly can. :)

AN UPDATE

Sorry for the long silence. Been delaying to write a new post..

Hmm..life has been pretty hectic and busy lately. Have to finish a lot things this month. Next week we gonna have this conference within our school and although I have finished my power point slides, I haven't practice though..hopefully it is within the time limit.

I am 'babysitting' a new student who is going to continue my work for his PhD. Expanding it basically. Gosh! He is so 'different' than me! My supervisor warned me about that. Cara dia communicate with you makes you wanna shake his body and said 'please speak loudly and clearly please!!'..he is kinda slowing me down in my work. Tapi kena sabar la for a while..it is good to share your knowledge. I hope I can at least show him once what I am doing..after that, I need to be on my own. I don't mind teaching him but not while I am doing my work. Not only for my benefit but also for him because I can concentrate on him and not dividing my attention in making sure he understands and focusing in doing my work..especially when I am dealing with chemicals. Huhuhu...

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I have this habit of reading a blog that makes me rolling my eyes..hahaha..basically addicted to reading blogs that makes me so menyampah. Tapi I never leave a comment or anything, just a silent reader. Gosh..I know..that's bad habit, heheh..Mr. PIC kept saying why are you reading them then? So, I am trying to just stick with the blogs that I really2 like. So that I tak sakit jiwa. Is there anyone out there having the same habit?

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Maybe we gonna watch a movie today. I wanna watch The King's Speech. Looks like an amazing movie to watch, and I love Colin Firth. I hope he will win the Oscar.

Till then.

2011

Happy New Year to all, hope it is not too late yah.

Anyhow, Mr. PIC is sleeping and it is 4.36am here in Birmingham. Tak boleh tidur. I was asleep just now but then I suddenly woke up and I had been tossing and turning..pegi toilet..minum air..tried to sleep again..then decided to just wake up and surf the internet.

Oh, did I mention yg I am in Birmingham? aha..well, my SIL was registering her marriage here in the UK and the nearest place to do that was in Reading. So, on the 29th, we went down south to Maidenhead, where she lives, meet up with my in-laws..yg sampai on the 26th..then on the 30th went to Reading, had a simple but nice wedding reception..then jalan2 kat London and Bath..finally here we are in Birmingham..saja nak jalan2..tapi today me and Mr.PIC will be heading back to Newcastle, yg lain balik ke Maidenhead. This Friday, they will come to Newcastle and jalan2 kat north pulak.

On new year's eve, we went to Madame Tussaud. It was my second time and I didn't take as much pictures as I did when I went there last time. I selected certain wax people je, dulu dgn semua nak ambik but yg paling penting dengan Shah Rukh Khan mesti ada..heheh..

Nway, my in laws nak tgk Big Ben and the Parliment Building and since it is winter, sekejap je dah malam..but it was a beautiful sight..I felt happy to see those buildings at night, mmg cantik. The photos I had taken didn't do justice though..sob sob..anyhow, people were starting to arrive at Westminster to watch the fireworks later on and after a while, we decided to go home tapi kena go to another tube station that was like 15-20 minutes walk..we had to cross the Westminster Bridge..orang dah start settling down ala2 mcm having a picnic..sebab nak have a good spot..maybe kalau just me and Mr.PIC..boleh la tunggu and watch the countdown kot..hahaha..tapi memikirkan nak balik mcm mana tu yg susah..unless you dapat book a nearby hotel la kot..

So, the new year already came and went. I can't believe I am ending my 3rd year in 4 months time...this is very cliche but really, how fast time flies. Mcm baru semalam Mr. PIC sampai sini..but he is here for a year already. A lot of things to do this month. I have to prepare the necessary things to apply for an extension..hopefully sampai end of this year only. InsyaAllah.

Achievements in 2010? Hmm..have I been a good wife? kena tanya Mr. PIC la..heheh..a good student? I would like to think so :)

This year..kalau ada rezeki..I want to have a baby..it is not going to be easy I know..but..it will be worth it..I want to give him a son..I really do..*teary eyes*..that will be a bonus..

Alright then..happy new year again people.